I'm having a bit of an off night... Had a great time with Stephie tonight watching pitsburg send the sens golfing :) Don't like pitsburg but hate the sens MUCH more lol..
But I lay here getting ready to hit sleep cause I have to work tomorrow and I miss my bf... and part of me still somewhere wonders if he's really up to what he tells me he is... the good thing is most of me KNOWS he's where he says he is... just somewhere deep in there there's still a little voice that doesn't want to let me forget the things that have happened and the pain I have felt... it's time for me to figure out how to move forward.
He told me the other night he fully trusts me again and that's HUGE for me... and great news :) means that I'm proving through my actions the way I want to be and that makes me happy... I have changed a lot but still remain the girl for him and I know in my heart he's the one for me.. just gotta keep goin with the flow ... time really is a huge factor in the way things happen and heal.
The more I think the more I realise every relationship is all about growth... it isn't the good times that show us where our relationships stand but rather the bad times that force us to prove to eachother that we truely want to be a part of the relationship. It's the tests that prove it's good bad or ugly...
Jake and I have come through so much... if we keep trying and continue to allow ourselves to love eachother I think we'll be just fine :)
hmm... time for sleep now..
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Thursday, April 1, 2010
5 million years much?
holy it'a been forever! time for an update!!!
Work-
Well I FINALLY got a job!!! I'm the new promotions assistant for 2 stations in my area :) very very exciting stuff!!! it's not a lot of hours yet which isn't so nice on the pay check but it will pick up as the weather gets warmer ... Basically as a promotions assistant my job is to set up speakers and signs and hang out and hand out free stuff and meet people.... it's perfectly suited for me and I LOVE it! :) :)
Boyfriend-
Jake and I are doing well right now... it's been 3 months that we've been back together in a couple days... definately doesn't feel that long... probably because it wasn't until just a couple weeks ago that he actually started acting like he gave a shit again... we had a lot of ups and downs the first while but he's coming around again... let's hope this time it's for good.
Friends-
Steph and Jenn and I hung out last night :) it was a lot of fun ... oooo how I love those girls.. Jenn wasn't feeling well though so she went home early.. then steph and I watched the original Alice in Wonderland... Great movie!!
Britt and I aren't talking.. probably won't be for a long time.. she's just been really shady and I don't have the time or energy for it with everything else that's happening in my life.
Life in general-
Is pretty good... I love my job... I love my bf... and I Absolutely love my friends... I can't really ask for much more... well bye for now :)
Chan
Work-
Well I FINALLY got a job!!! I'm the new promotions assistant for 2 stations in my area :) very very exciting stuff!!! it's not a lot of hours yet which isn't so nice on the pay check but it will pick up as the weather gets warmer ... Basically as a promotions assistant my job is to set up speakers and signs and hang out and hand out free stuff and meet people.... it's perfectly suited for me and I LOVE it! :) :)
Boyfriend-
Jake and I are doing well right now... it's been 3 months that we've been back together in a couple days... definately doesn't feel that long... probably because it wasn't until just a couple weeks ago that he actually started acting like he gave a shit again... we had a lot of ups and downs the first while but he's coming around again... let's hope this time it's for good.
Friends-
Steph and Jenn and I hung out last night :) it was a lot of fun ... oooo how I love those girls.. Jenn wasn't feeling well though so she went home early.. then steph and I watched the original Alice in Wonderland... Great movie!!
Britt and I aren't talking.. probably won't be for a long time.. she's just been really shady and I don't have the time or energy for it with everything else that's happening in my life.
Life in general-
Is pretty good... I love my job... I love my bf... and I Absolutely love my friends... I can't really ask for much more... well bye for now :)
Chan
Monday, March 15, 2010
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby I don't know why ya treatin me so bad
You said you love me,
no one above me
And I was all you had
And though my heart is eating for ya
I can't stop crying
I don't know how I allow you to treat me this way
and still i stay
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby I don't know why ya wanna do me wrong
See when I'm home, I'm all alone
And you are always gone
And boy, you kno I really love you
I can't deny
I can't see how you could bring me to so many tears
after all these years
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Oohhhhh I trusted you,
I trusted you So sad,
so sad what love will make you do
all the things that we accept
be the things that we regret
too all of my ladies (ladies) feel me c'mon sing wit me
See, when I get the strength to leave You
always tell me that you need me
And I'm weak cause I believe you
And I'm mad because I love you
So I stop and think that maybe
You can learn to appreciate me
Then it all remains the same that
You ain't never gonna change
(never gonna change, never gonna change)
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
Butm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby why you hurt me leave me and desert me
Boy I gave you all my heart And all you do is tear it up
Looking out my window Knowing that I should go
Even when I pack my bags
something always hold me back
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby I don't know why ya treatin me so bad
You said you love me,
no one above me
And I was all you had
And though my heart is eating for ya
I can't stop crying
I don't know how I allow you to treat me this way
and still i stay
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby I don't know why ya wanna do me wrong
See when I'm home, I'm all alone
And you are always gone
And boy, you kno I really love you
I can't deny
I can't see how you could bring me to so many tears
after all these years
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Oohhhhh I trusted you,
I trusted you So sad,
so sad what love will make you do
all the things that we accept
be the things that we regret
too all of my ladies (ladies) feel me c'mon sing wit me
See, when I get the strength to leave You
always tell me that you need me
And I'm weak cause I believe you
And I'm mad because I love you
So I stop and think that maybe
You can learn to appreciate me
Then it all remains the same that
You ain't never gonna change
(never gonna change, never gonna change)
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
Butm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
Baby why you hurt me leave me and desert me
Boy I gave you all my heart And all you do is tear it up
Looking out my window Knowing that I should go
Even when I pack my bags
something always hold me back
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
2010 = MY year!!
I decided on new years eve that 2010 would be all about me and what I want and need... I decided I was going to stop putting my wants and needs and feelings on the back burner and so far so good...
Mister and I are back together... it's official! Happened on the 3rd :) I couldn't be happier! I love him very much and I'm glad that we're working through things!!
Stephie and I hang out at least 2 times a week and I LOVE it!! my wifey is the shit!! we watched the sound of music the other night and did facails and our nails and had a sleep over!!! ** How do you solve a problem like mariaaaaaa** hahaha.. Love her!!
Daddo and I are still gettin along well although we had a pretty rough argument last night.. things can't always be perfect though so it's ok. we'll get past it...
2 things I'm leavin in 2009 "Whatever" and "I'm over it"
I need to be honest about how I feel.
Talk soon :)
Mister and I are back together... it's official! Happened on the 3rd :) I couldn't be happier! I love him very much and I'm glad that we're working through things!!
Stephie and I hang out at least 2 times a week and I LOVE it!! my wifey is the shit!! we watched the sound of music the other night and did facails and our nails and had a sleep over!!! ** How do you solve a problem like mariaaaaaa** hahaha.. Love her!!
Daddo and I are still gettin along well although we had a pretty rough argument last night.. things can't always be perfect though so it's ok. we'll get past it...
2 things I'm leavin in 2009 "Whatever" and "I'm over it"
I need to be honest about how I feel.
Talk soon :)
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